I’m not sure if I’m just being impatient, if Apple has been dragging their feet, or if Apple is just under staffed and can’t approve applications fast enough. Either way, the Apple App Approval process sucks. It’s slow, inefficient, subjective, and big brother-ish. Based on conversations with dozens of developers, the average review time for an app to get accepted or rejected is about five days. To me this is too long and should be 1-3 days. I understand that Apple needs to control the overall apps that are pushed out to the iPhone and iPod Touch users, but having to wait for an app to be approved over a week really sucks. I feel like I’ve called Apple support and the representative placed me on hold and then went on a smoke break (I know I used to work in a support environment), or that I emailed customer service about an billing issue and they reply with a canned answer asking me more questions about how great of a job they performed. Just approve the apps already!

I have two apps in the App Store, Hi Jinx Pro and Hi Jinx Lite. Both of these apps are soundboards which simply play a prerecorded sound clip. The Pro version is $0.99 and the lite version is, of course, free. I first submitted the Pro version and it was approved within 4 days. There was an update (v1.1) submitted and this took 5 days for an approval. I submitted the lite version and it took over three weeks to get it approved. It first was rejected with the following email reply:

Dear Mr. Morris,

Thank you for submitting Hi Jinx Lite to the App Store. We’ve reviewed Hi Jinx Lite and determined that we cannot post this version of your iPhone application to the App Store because it contains objectionable content and is in violation of Section 3.3.12 from the iPhone SDK Agreement which states:

“Applications must not contain any obscene, pornographic, offensive or defamatory content or materials of any kind (text, graphics, images, photographs, etc.), or other content or materials that in Apple’s reasonable judgement may be found objectionable by iPhone or iPod touch users.”

It would be appropriate to remove the “Wiffle” sound byte from your application.  If you believe that you can make the necessary changes so that Hi Jinx Lite does not violate the iPhone SDK Agreement we encourage you to do so and resubmit it for review.

Regards,
iPhone Developer Program

Okay, one of the sounds had the following sound clip:

I am going to get familiar on your rectum with a wiffle ball bat.

I guess that can be considered offensive or obscene, but first of all, the Pro version has this clip already and it was already approved twice. How did it get by on the Pro version? This is the subjective part of the app approval process. I know of other apps that have more offensive material, specifically these other apps have curse words in their sound clips. How did those apps get approved? Either way, I’ll play the game and change the sound clip, which now only says “wiffle ball bat”. I resubmitted the app and then 6 days later received the following email:

Hello JDMdesign,

Hi Jinx Lite cannot be posted because it is a feature-limited version.  Free or “Lite” versions are acceptable, however the application must be a fully functional app and cannot reference features that are not implemented or up-sell to the full version.

Please upload a new binary and correct metadata using iTunes Connect <http://itunesconnect.apple.com/>.

Regards,
iPhone Developer Program

As you can see from the greeting in the email, a different Apple approval representative was reviewing the app or the original reviewer used was different canned template reply. The entire reason for having a lite or free version companion to a paid version app is to allow the user to try out the app and then go buy the full version of the app. Most all the pay apps have a sibling free or lite version in the app store and all of them have some kind of link or reference to the paid version. I was just flabbergasted when I got this email. The reviewer also attached a screen shot of the app, for which they were referring to when they stated the app was feature-limited. If you clicked on any character besides Mr. Richardson, you would goto a screen showing the character and gave you a single sound clip. This was a way to show the users that other characters were available in the Pro version. Other apps do the same thing… I figured I would play the game again and change this part of the app. I removed the character selector and just added the screen for sampling other characters to the about screen and took out the pitch for purchasing the pro version. I did keep a button (or two) which link to the pro version. After rebuilding the app, it was resubmitted to the all mightly god, Apple and its app approver disciples. After another 6 days, I finially got the approval letter stating that Hi Jinx Lite was available for download. Thank god, I mean thank Apple.

Since then, I have submitted a second version of Hi Jinx Lite, which has been waiting for approval for over two weeks. The only difference in the add is the graphics, a feature for allowing uses to send comments back to me, and two clips, promoting new characters in the Pro version (Kegger Keith and Nigel Smith). I also submitted another version of Hi Jinx Pro, which I have been waiting 5 days and counting. This will be a test, as I have not removed the wiffle ball bat reference from the Pro version. I wonder if the all mighty App Reviewer will be offended by this sound clip or if they will get the joke and push it through the door? Only time will tell.